A Dozen Steps

Happy? Happy???

by Mark on April 26th, 2007

Yeah, I’m sure many will say they are… and I’d be tempted to refer them to the poem JJ shared with us in a recent post.

Self-delusion. Masks.

Of course! Some truly are! How about you?

“We are convinced God wants us to live happy, joyous, and free.” Why did they feel compelled to say this in our Big Book? I believe they knew because they’d been there and many, no doubt, were still there.

“I give you the impression that I’m secure, that all is sunny and unruffled with me, within as well as without.”

Kudos to whomever it was that first offered us the suggestion to lose the fear of “ratting” on our disease! “We are only as sick as our darkest secrets.”

“Honesty is the truth and the truth will set us free!” By God! I want to be free!!!

“Do you want to be right, or do you want to be happy?” Does the answer to this really have to be rocket science? Happy, dammit!!! And… what a shame that the whole world doesn’t know this.

Then comes today’s reading - followed by - consternation?

Happiness Is Not The Point

“I don’t think happiness or unhappiness is the point. How do we meet the problems we face? How do we best learn from them and transmit what we have learned to others, if they would receive the knowledge?”

This quote is attributed to Bill Wilson, as is this one, “When pain comes, we are expected to learn from it willingly, and help others to learn. When happiness comes, we accept it as a gift, and thank God for it.”

What all this means? Today, to me? Within the past year, one specific situation called for a great deal of patience which I certainly was not perfectly maintaining. It involved two folks who had placed themselves in a position of trust, online to the public, with this gift of recovery. Initially, I was supportive. Once they began to pass along bad information that had harmful capabilities, I called them on it in that public forum and was chastised and mocked. I retracted my support. Did my best to let it go.

Within the last 48 hours it was revealed that one, or both, of the participants had been consuming alcohol and claiming to be in recovery. So, I’ll ask you - what nature of person am I? Part of my “nature” wants to scream out “I told you so!” The more reasonable “nature” is not at all happy about anyone in the process of killing themselves. Yet I see it as the continuing practice of other folks co-signing bull malarkey and allowing the disease to prosper. Why? Because many chastise and mock the experience, strength and hope offered by folks who’ve been around and have learned through pain what the right things to do are. Of course, this is probably why Bill said “If they would receive the knowledge.”

Too many don’t want the knowledge - one additional reservation to develop an excuse to drink, as if we needed another.

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POSTED IN: Experience, Strength and Hope, Reality